Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize