we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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