FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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