I got chris browned last night
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize
