You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
