Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
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