the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
