Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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