Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize
