i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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