Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
