It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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