I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
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