It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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