buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
