hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
