So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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