eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
