I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Randomize
