so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
