So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
