i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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