I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
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