For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
