I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I need a hoe opinion
go on
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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