Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
