I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
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