you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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