dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
