she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
