Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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