But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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