Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
