apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
