I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
