She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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