if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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