Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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