just come out here and I will go home with you...
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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