I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
