Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
