You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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