how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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