Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
