Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize