We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
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