i don't plan on having that self control this summer
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
17 year olds will be the death of me.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
