i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Randomize
