If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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