Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
