i permit you to call me
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
