Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
